Twin Peaks Tavern – Castro
Walking into Twin Peaks, the first thing I noticed was the over powering smell of oatmeal cookies emanating from Hot Cookie next door. It sounds like a strange combination, but a bar that smells like grandma’s cookies is a wonderful thing indeed. In addition to the fantastic smell and the bar’s historic significance as the first gay bar to have large, unblocked windows, Twin Peaks is a great bar in its own right. (more…)
Empress of China – Chinatown
While Empress of China is technically a restaurant bar, it is a must see in Chinatown. There are few things I love more than decaying luxury. This bar was obviously the shit thirty years ago, as evidenced by their wall of celebrity photos. (more…)
Buddha Lounge – Chinatown
My trip to Buddha Lounge was pretty uneventful, although the bar started hopping right as I left for the night. Like the rest of Chinatown’s bars, the bar’s crowd is a late one, and the crowd at Buddha is there for one thing, dice. By midnight there are dice games going the length of the bar, and people of all walks of life try to beat the bartender’s luck. (more…)
EZ5 – Chinatown
Chinatown is seriously some kind of time warp. Not only can one lose all sense of reality when knocking back a few in its tiny bars, I can’t for the life of me get my numbers straight. EZ5 is bar #33. Sheesh.
Anyhow, EZ5 was simply awesome. Chinatown was the last place I expected to find a bar with a dance floor and a D.J. spinning hip hop and R&B. We entered as Aaliyah came on the sound system, and the music stayed fantastic for the duration. The bar is spacious and has hands down the cleanest bathrooms in Chinatown. While I love a funky dive bar, sometimes it’s nice to have a break from the smell of piss and stale beer. (more…)
Lipo Lounge – Chinatown
Again, my counting ability was not so great that night. Lipo Lounge was actually bar #32 and the last stop on our Chinatown bar crawl, and it was the perfect place to end the night. Upstairs, the bar was packed with friendly, very drunk Chinese business men, and the drinks were tiny but still quite strong. Downstairs was a totally different story. (more…)
L’Amour Nightclub – Chinatown
By the time we stumbled upon L’amour, my 30th bar, my ability to count was a bit impaired. L’amour was an unexpected treat, a bar I had never heard of on a small side street. This is all that one can see from street level: (more…)
Mr. Bings – Chinatown
Mr. Bings has a triangular bar, which makes it one of the coolest spaces I’ve been to. Initially the vibe was kind of disappointing. The bar was brightly lit and empty, and the bartender was watching Nascar at full volume, not exactly conducive to the rocking night out I desired. However, once the Chinese liquor started flowing, the vibe instantly became friendlier and everyone loosened up and started really enjoying themselves. (more…)
Bow Bow – Chinatown
Bow Bow was actually my 28th bar, but I could not for the life of me remember which number it was at the time. The bar was tiny with red lights everywhere and Chinese karaoke songs providing the soundtrack. The bartender was fabulous in a vintage fur jacket, and while she didn’t seem overly enthusiastic about us interrupting her quiet Sunday night, she soon warmed up to us. (more…)
Club Kristi – Tenderloin
The most exciting thing about Club Kristi is the fact that it was the last bar on my Tenderloin list. Down from 36 to 27 due to closures, covers, or bars being outside of the TL borders, the Tenderloin bars nonetheless made up an epic adventure. I went to more hostess bars than I ever imagined existed in the neighborhood, I had to endure endless sports games on giant screen t.v.’s, and I had some close calls with crack dealers, but overall it was a positive experience. I have always felt that more often than not, bars that are sketchy and rundown on the outside contain great people or at least great stories on the inside. I’m glad the Tenderloin bars were no exception. (more…)
The Hot Spot – Tenderloin
Hot Spot was a great surprise, a cozy little bar on one of the dingiest blocks of Market Street. Bars like this are my inspiration for doing The Experiment, hidden pockets of fun that I might otherwise have overlooked. (more…)
Union Square Sports Bar – Tenderloin
First things first, whoever named this bar Union Square Sports Bar was definitely a glass half full kind of person. This is without a doubt a Tenderloin bar. The bar owner also has a love for flat screen t.v.’s, so much so that there are 18(!) in a ring around the bar. (more…)
21 Club – Tenderloin
As you can probably surmise from my handwriting, 21 Club was the final stop on our Heart of the Tenderloin mini bar crawl. This bar is another hidden gem; the room is tiny and crowded with all sorts of ne’er-do-well’s, rough around the edges but friendly enough and eager to share the limited space. We drank beers while arguing about the pro wrestling on t.v., cheering on whichever half naked beef cake seemed to be winning at the moment. (more…)
Jonell’s Cocktail Lounge – Tenderloin
Jonell’s was the second stop on my Heart of the Tenderloin mini bar crawl. It is also where shit went down. The corner of Ellis and Jones is so bad that the police have set up cameras at the intersection, and the cameras apparently are quite effective. As soon as some crack dealers started trying to sell drugs in the doorway of the bar, the police came racing in, dragging the dealers into the bar, just a few steps from our bar stools. What followed was a brief but extremely intense and gun filled standoff that left us all surging with adrenaline for the rest of the evening.
Before the drama, the bar owner read everyone’s palms except mine, which she said didn’t show anything because I live too much in my head. It seems everyone else I was drinking with is fated to have lots of kids, so I am pretty okay with having an inscrutable destiny. Also, it seems my friend T. and the bar owner are long lost soul mates of some sort, twins from different generations and countries. All said, Jonell’s is a pretty amazing bar.
Jonell’s Cocktail Lounge
98 Turk StSan Francisco, CA 94102
Aunt Charlie’s Lounge – Tenderloin
I didn’t realize Aunt Charlie’s charges cover, so I only made it into the doorway. I will probably go back on a non Experiment related trip, as a lot of my friends really love that bar.
133 Turk StSan Francisco, CA 94102
Cinnabar – Tenderloin
Cinnabar was the first stop on a mini “Heart of the Tenderloin” bar crawl. The corner of Ellis and Jones is no joke, so I wrangled five of my friends into coming along with me. To my surprise, Cinnabar was actually the tamest of the bars we hit, but it was also fairly early in the evening. (more…)
The Outsider – Tenderloin
For some reason I had been putting off going to The Outsider. Something about it didn’t appeal to me, although it is a perfectly nice dive bar. The bartenders were friendly and ready to party, the music was good, thanks to a patron with dollars to spend in the jukebox, and I appreciated the flattering red light. (more…)
Castle – Tenderloin
Castle was the perfect andtidote to Swig. It’s a slightly dingy bar with disreputable looking patrons and awkward lighting, a typical TL hostess bar. I had a lovely time getting sloshed on well drinks and watching the foot traffic through their front window. (more…)
Swig – Tenderloin
Expensive drinks, rude and uber-yuppie clientele, it’s hard to find anything to like about Swig. However… (more…)
High Tide – Tenderloin
(Please excuse the misspelling on the napkin.) The night before last I had a dream about the High Tide… (more…)
R.J.’s Sports Bar
I fell in love with this bar the second I walked in the door, when the bartender asked us if we wanted hot dogs. FREE, DEEP FRIED HOT DOGS! I was so mad at myself for having eaten Burmese food just before walking to the bar… (more…)
Gangway – Tenderloin
What to say about the Gangway? It’s one of those bars that seems to suck you into another dimension, making you lose all normal sense of time and space. I’m not sure I have adequate words to describe the Gangway, except one: intense.
800 Larkin – Tenderloin
800 Larkin is definitely one of those bars I probably would never have entered if not for the Experiment. The bar’s bare exterior gives no clue as to the type of establishment within… (more…)
The San Francisco Bar Experiment 
